Y is for Yet
If you’re looking for a friend who will make you happy, look no further.
If you’re looking for a poem that will soothe and inspire you, here it is.
If you’re looking for a present to give yourself, ta-da!
Yet.
There it is.
Did you blink? Did you miss it? Here it is again:
Yet.
Yet is the most loving and constant companion your heart could hope to meet.
Yet is a lyrical lullaby to delight and calm your soul.
Yet is the gift that will keep on rewarding you, time and again.
Keep it close.
Because yet, though tiny, is perfectly formed and contains worlds of wisdom and grace within it.
Yet is full of appreciation for all that you’ve achieved so far, and will remind you of it freely whenever you need reminding.
Yet is excited by what’s to come and is thrilled at the prospect of the journey, bags permanently packed and ready.
Yet is deeply compassionate, the most supportive friend who always knows the right thing to say (and how to make your tea with just the right amount of milk).
Yet is a three-letter reminder that we are constantly evolving, in flux; not there yet because there’s no there there…just more to come, and more to come, till there’s no more of anything. Yet sees life as a sequence of moments, each packed with the potential to shift and turn on a ninepence, the possibility of perpetual change hiding in plain view.
When we find ourselves in Critical Judge mode, surveying the landscape of our lives and seeing only lack and loss and disappointment like fixed and calcified statues to our failures,
THAT is when we need to call on the grace and wisdom of Yet. Yet knows, with absolute confidence, that all is well (because even if it’s not well now, well remains available to us even if it’s not..quite..here..yet).
When we call out to Yet, we hear:
“My friends are all thriving in their careers and I’m going nowhere fast.”
“You just haven’t found your flow yet, which means there’s more exploring for us to do; there’s an opportunity here for us.”
“Everyone is getting married and I’m perpetually single.”
“So you haven’t found your person yet; that’s ok, it’s a process. How can we best enjoy the ride?”
“I’ve zero confidence in this new job. I should never have come here”
“You’re not fully confident, yet; that’s ok. Why would you be? You’re still learning. You’re SO much more confident that you were three months ago – do you remember? Imagine how much more confident you’ll be in another year.”
“I’m never going to feel joy again.”
“Loss isn’t a fixed state. We need to hang out here awhile to honour your grieving but I know that peace and joy are available for you. I’ll hold on to them for you because I know that you can’t, yet, and that’s ok. We’ll get through this together.”
Given the perpetual noise and pace and race and distraction and scroll and chase and notification and comparison and rinse and repeat of modern-day life, Yet offers itself as an enormous pause button, creating much needed space to breath into. A space to perch on the fulcrum between stasis and action, to take in the view, get some perspective, remember what we forgot to remember, reconnect to what really matters, have a nibble on a Scotch egg and retie our shoe laces before stepping into the fray again.
Yet isn’t a place of change, but it facilitates it. We don’t grow in the pause, but we grow from the pause.
Critical Judge has a fixed mindset, whereas Yet's mindset is about perpetual flow and opportunity, about discovery and gleeful, “WOAH, LOOK OVER THERE! Is that something we could try?”
And it's because Yet puts our Critical Judge on pause, too, that we're able to reflect and grow. We’re able to appraise our situation with enough compassion to accept that we’re not acting, achieving or 'being' in the way that we want, yet; and to be ok enough with that to make a loving choice about the next step or overarching direction that’s feels more aligned for us.
This loving pause also offers enough safety so that we can sit with the trickier questions that might need to be asked:
· Is this really the path I want to be on or is time to make a change?
· Am I not thriving because my heart’s not really in it?
· Am I holding myself back to protect the feelings of someone else?
· What’s most stopping me from acting in a way that’s true to myself?
Yet is part of the lexicon of grace, which is why we can only feel its presence with reassurance and a sense of calm. And Yet is packed with wisdom just beyond our current cognisance but that we can tune into, if we breathe deeply and cock an ear into the fecund pause.
So the next time you notice your Critical Judge giving you a hammering about some perceived lack or failure, ask yourself, “What do I not know, yet?” and let the peace descend on you like a million snowflakes grazing your face like a kiss.